Excerpts from Paula Vogel workshop

Playwright Paula Vogel changed my life this weekend. I was fortunate enough to be invited to her Playwright's Boot Camp.

Here was my answer to one of her koan assignments. I believe that I failed, but that is the point I think.

ASSIGNMENT (15 mins allowed)
Write a short play that cannot be produced.


Life story of a Philadelphia Theater Critic
a short play, by Bruce Walsh
 

                                                Woman giving birth:

                                               

35-year-old theater critic appears, naked, small penis, looks at mother

THEATER CRITIC

Yeah, pretty much what I expected. 

                                                SHIFT: Arkansas

THEATER CRITIC

Pretty much what I expected.

                                                SHIFT: Moscow

THEATER CRITIC

Pretty much what I expected.

                                                SHIFT: The moon.

THEATER CRITIC

I saw this on TV.

                                                SHIFT: Having sex with a woman

THEATER CRITIC

Could you move your hips, please?

                                                SHIFT: Standing before God

THEATER CRITIC

I have a movie idea I want to pitch you.

THE END